Night time with Matty is one of my favorite times of the day. We go up to his room, sit in the rocking chair, I nurse him and then we read at least one book before bed time. Last night I chose Love You Forever by Robert Munsch.
When I first got the book I tried to read it to Matthew when he was just days old and couldn't get through it with out sobbing. As touching as the book is, I am not usually the sappy type so I chalked it up to hormones. Now that he is 4 months old, I thought I'd give it another whirl. Unfortunately, I quickly realized that either my postpartum hormones are still in full effect or it's just a really good book that makes me cry when I read it, because by the last page the tears were freely flowing from my eyes and down my cheeks.
The words in the book are just so true. No matter what Matthew does that makes me angry or annoyed as he grows, I will love him forever, I will like him for always, As long as I'm living, My baby he'll be.
I sat there and really let the words sink in. I would do anything for him, and I hope he never doubts that. My main objective in life now is to love him and teach him the tools he needs to be, first and foremost, a good person. When he's little I'll savor the time that he's a mama's boy, but as he grows, my wish for him is to be independent and a hard worker, but also know that he can always count on his mommy to be there to guide him and love him.
As I sat there last night rocking my baby to sleep, I looked down at him with tears still flowing down my face, and he looked up at me and smiled and then reached up to touch my face. It was the most beautiful moment, and it's a memory that I'll cherish for all time. Matty Luke I will Love You Forever.
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Friday, January 17, 2014
Mommyhood is amazing
Wow, it's been a really long time since I've written to my blog. No, I am not still pregnant!
Matthew Lucas was born on September 24, 2013 at 3:22 p.m. weighing 7 lbs 10 oz and 19 3/4 inches long. He is absolutely amazing and the best thing that has ever happened to me. After nearly 2 years of trying to conceive Matthew, and possibly the worst pregnancy I could imagine, I can honestly say, every heart ache, every tear, every trip to the toilet bowl, was worth it.
I can't even remember what my life was like before he was in it. Before being a mom, I liked to do my own thing and have alone time where I could just decompress after work and on the weekends. Now, I can't wait to get home so I can snuggle my baby, talk to and play with him and nurse him. Nursing is such an awesome experience. It's a bond that I can't really explain. It makes me feel so content to be able to provide for my baby in such a close and personal way.
He is just shy of four months, and I have learned what his different cries mean - there's one for hunger, dirty diapers, tiredness and then my favorite one... the "I miss mommy" one. I just have to go pick him up and it's like all is right in the world again. He's laughing and becoming more vocal every day and he's just such a happy and content little dude. The love I have for him makes my heart literally want to burst open.
When it's a particularly tough day at work or the hubs and I just aren't on the same page, I look at that little boy and none of that matters. As long as he's happy and cared for, that's truly all I need to be happy. I of course still care about my work, but my priorities did a complete 180 after Matt was born and instead of stressing about the every day struggles in life, I now see the bigger picture.The laundry and dishes can wait if my boy wants to be held just a little while longer. After all, he's only this small for so long and then he'll grow up and won't want to snuggle with me. So, I am going to savor it while it lasts.
Matthew Lucas was born on September 24, 2013 at 3:22 p.m. weighing 7 lbs 10 oz and 19 3/4 inches long. He is absolutely amazing and the best thing that has ever happened to me. After nearly 2 years of trying to conceive Matthew, and possibly the worst pregnancy I could imagine, I can honestly say, every heart ache, every tear, every trip to the toilet bowl, was worth it.
I can't even remember what my life was like before he was in it. Before being a mom, I liked to do my own thing and have alone time where I could just decompress after work and on the weekends. Now, I can't wait to get home so I can snuggle my baby, talk to and play with him and nurse him. Nursing is such an awesome experience. It's a bond that I can't really explain. It makes me feel so content to be able to provide for my baby in such a close and personal way.
He is just shy of four months, and I have learned what his different cries mean - there's one for hunger, dirty diapers, tiredness and then my favorite one... the "I miss mommy" one. I just have to go pick him up and it's like all is right in the world again. He's laughing and becoming more vocal every day and he's just such a happy and content little dude. The love I have for him makes my heart literally want to burst open.
When it's a particularly tough day at work or the hubs and I just aren't on the same page, I look at that little boy and none of that matters. As long as he's happy and cared for, that's truly all I need to be happy. I of course still care about my work, but my priorities did a complete 180 after Matt was born and instead of stressing about the every day struggles in life, I now see the bigger picture.The laundry and dishes can wait if my boy wants to be held just a little while longer. After all, he's only this small for so long and then he'll grow up and won't want to snuggle with me. So, I am going to savor it while it lasts.
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