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Monday, May 18, 2015


You know it's been a long, trying weekend when you are happy it's Monday.

On Friday last week, I went to the doctor to check on a cough that's been plaguing me for a few weeks now. I'm glad I went, because I have a sinus infection and the start of bronchitis, which would have only gotten worse without antibiotics. It's crazy, because when I was pregnant with Matthew, I didn't so much as sneeze the entire time, but with this little one on the way, I can't stay healthy.  I am sure a major component is how much Matt's been sick this school year. He is patient zero when it comes to all of these germs, and he just loves to share them with me.

As I am sure you can gather, he has also been plagued by the same cough and congestion that I have had, so I figured I should probably take him to the pediatrician to get him checked out, too. While we were there, I found out that not only does he have a sinus infection like me, but he also has a raging ear infection in his right ear.

I feel terrible that my little guy has been suffering and I had no idea. With the changing of the season, I figured we were both experiencing the side effects of seasonal allergies from the newly cut lawns, the budding trees, the pollen and Marley shedding her winter hair. Matthew wasn't complaining of an ear ache, and although he was coughing and sneezing he didn't seem all that sick. That was until we started him on the Amoxicillin. The doctor was impressed that it's the first time he's been on it in his 19 months of life, especially since we are at the doctor for what feels like at least once a month for one reason or another.

Now, three days later, his symptoms have magnified tenfold. My poor baby isn't sleeping well, because his cough is keeping him and the entire house up all night. He's also started tugging at the infected ear and purple bags have appeared beneath his eyelids. It's gut-wrenching to see your child sick.

Yesterday, we went to my niece's First Communion and party. He's been on antibiotics, so he isn't contagious and he was in pretty good spirits that morning. He did great at church, minus the numerous coughing fits, so we went to lunch with the family after the Mass Celebration. It was while we were there that Matt's coughing got out of control. At one point it got so bad that he threw up all over the table, his high chair, his shirt, the floor, and although I caught a good majority of it in my hands, I wasn't quite quick enough to contain it all before there was a huge mess. I'd like to apologize for all of the people in attendance who's appetite was lost after the commotion. I was mortified as my husband took Matt to the bathroom to get him cleaned up, and I was on the floor cleaning up the mess. I was grateful that everyone was so understanding, but it was still embarrassing nonetheless.

I hope my little one feels better soon. It's a special day at Pop-Pop's, so hopefully, a day of rest will help him kick this illness sooner rather than later, so we can all sleep more soundly. We've got less than 4 months left before the newborn stage is back in full effect. I'd love it if I could get a little sleep in before then.

Thursday, May 14, 2015

So many similarities that I forgot about

Over the past few days, I have been looking back and re-reading some of the blog posts I wrote when I was pregnant with Matt. I can't believe the similarities...I was miserable then, too!

This entire pregnancy I have groaned about it being so much harder on me than my first, which is partially true, because I don't have the time or the ability to lay around on the couch and do nothing like I did when I was pregnant with Matt. Don't get me wrong, my house is still a mess and the laundry still piles up like it did when I was pregnant with Matthew, but I am not laying around with my feet up constantly. Instead, I am busy chasing him, giving him baths, feeding him safe foods and loving being his mommy. But physically, I am finding that both pregnancies are very similar. They both made me sick, sick, sick.

I also feel like I am huge compared to my first pregnancy, but apparently I am growing at the same rate as I did with Matthew. The posts about my belly "popping" are very similar to the gestational age of this one growing now.

I was miserable for the first half of this pregnancy, and although I remember being sick the entire pregnancy with Matt, I didn't remember the all day sickness with him. But according to my posts, I had it with him, too. Both kids have given me incredible heartburn, nausea and leg cramps. I am just as exhausted, and I am still worried about peeing myself if I have to throw up during the day. I also still have fears about being a mother, only this time, the anxiety focuses on being a mother of two rather than just a mom in general.

It's amazing though, mommy amnesia is a real thing. I don't remember it being so bad with Matt, but my blog posts say otherwise.

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Stop moving my due date!

I had my monthly obstetrics appointment today, and I went in thinking I had just hit the 23 week mark. However, as I am getting weighed, my blood pressure taken and discussing any problems or concerns, the nurse told me that they yet again changed my due date, and it is now to September 4th.

I know one day does not sound like a big deal, but when I started my pregnancy screenings I was originally told that I was due August 29th; then after my first sonogram they changed it to August 31st. After another sonogram it was changed again to September 3. So, in 4 months, my due date had changed three times. And now, after my anatomy scan four weeks ago, it's been changed again? I am starting to hate sonograms...

I know, I know it's one day, and what is the big deal? But as a very deadline-oriented person, I am beginning to feel like this kid is going to be baking forever! I obviously do not want to rush the pregnancy since I am planning on this being my last baby, but 9.5 months is long enough. I want to scream to the doctor, "stop making it longer!!!!"

I also know that babies could care less about due dates and come when they tell the mom it's time to meet the world, but to a hormonal woman that due date is everything. It's an end date. It's the finish line. It's a date I can visualize and plan for, but when it keeps rotating and changing it leaves me frustrated and annoyed.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Another allergy?

I think we're adding another allergen to the growing list of Matthew's food allergies. Every time he eats blueberries he gets diarrhea and a horrible diaper rash that lasts for days. On Sunday, against my better judgment, I let Matt eat several blueberries from a fruit salad. He picks them out and hoards them for himself because he loves them so much.

Sure enough, on Monday he started with "loose" bowels that progressed to diarrhea over the next few days. His butt has been red, but tolerable since Monday, but yesterday the full-blown diaper rash appeared. His poor bottom is so red that it hurts him to sit. He screams out when he soils his diaper and winces in pain when I apply his Nystatin prescription butt medication. Such a major mommy fail and I feel so terrible that he is going through this again.

I was desperate this morning to get his Nystatin refilled. I had called the prescription in last night and was told that the pharmacy was out of stock, but to come in the morning for a partial refill. When I got to Wegmans at 8:30 a.m. I was told that the shipment hadn't come in and that the pharmacy in fact did not have a partial script available to get him through the day. I almost cried. Actually, I did tear up as I tried to explain that my little guy could not go through the day without the cream. He had been up several times during the night because his butt hurt so badly that it would wake him from his dreams. I was not going to make him suffer all day long. So the woman called a different pharmacy and off I went to another location where I was able to get his full prescription filled.

He seems to be in better spirits today, but I am so disheartened to eliminate yet another food from his diet. I'll have the allergist officially test him at his next appointment in September, but until then, we'll avoid, avoid, avoid.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Infertility Awareness Week

It's Infertility Awareness Week again, and I'll always remember the feelings of being alone, helpless and desperate during the nearly 2 years it took to conceive Matthew. The hours spent at the Fertility Clinic, the devastation month after month of another negative pregnancy test, and then finally the total elation when we found out we were pregnant.

With this one on the way, we were completely surprised by the positive pregnancy test. We hadn't been trying for number two, and if I'm being honest, I was in denial for the first few months that it had happened and so easily. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. We had minor complications in the first trimester, and I thought for sure I would miscarry, but I didn't. This little bean is a fighter and held on. Now, at 21 weeks pregnant, I think I am finally more at ease knowing the baby is ok and growing appropriately. 

I don't know if I'll ever get over the "trauma" of infertility though. I may be fertile now, which happens to many couples, but the pain of those years will forever be a part of me. I wouldn't change it though, because I was blessed with my amazing son. I'd endure those struggles all over again if it meant being his and this new little one's mommy. I appreciate him more because of what I went through, and I have this overwhelming sense pride when it comes to being his mother.

CNN posted this article about four couples' experiences with infertility. It's a good read and sheds light on the struggles that so many couples have on their journeys to become parents. Sadly, not everyone achieves their end goal and my heart literally breaks for those still waiting, still struggling, still trying.…/infertility-journeys-ireport/index.html

CNN asked its iReporters to share stories of their journeys during Infertility Awareness Week.|By Ashley Strickland, CNN

Monday, April 20, 2015

Beautiful weekend!

I actually felt pretty good this weekend. It's been dicey over the last several weeks as to whether or not I'd be feeling well enough to do much, but I lucked out and felt well enough to get out and enjoy the weather.

Saturday, Eric and I went to the Families Touched by MS fundraiser, which is a local organization that raises money to do home renovations, buy needed equipment, etc. for families in the community who are living with multiple sclerosis. It's really a great cause and the money goes directly to people in need. We haven't been able to attend the last couple of years because of various conflicts, but it was great to see how much the annual event has grown since the last time we attended. I even stayed out until 11 p.m., and that never happens anymore!

On Sunday, Eric went golfing, so it was a Matty and Mommy day. I decided that I wasn't going to waste the day inside doing chores around the house, instead we were going to seize the moment and have some fun. After Matt's 3 hour nap in the morning, during which I did do housework, we went outside to blow bubbles, use sidewalk chalk and have a picnic. Matthew loved chasing the bubbles, but he might be a little too young for coloring on the sidewalk. He ended up coloring his shirt more than the actual cement. After lunch, we went to the grocery store to pick up this week's necessities, which included a fly swatter. A man also shopping got a kick out of Matthew bopping mommy on the head with it... several times. Why oh why did I teach him the "Little Bunny Foo Foo" song?

When we got home from Wegmans, Matt wanted to stay outside so we got Marley's leash, buckled the little guy into his stroller and walked the large loop around the neighborhood. I wasn't sure how wheeling the stroller, hanging onto Marley and being off balanced from the pregnancy was going to pan out, but it went surprisingly well. Marley was really well behaved and walked right next to me the whole walk and only picked up her pace one time because a mean-looking dog was outside unleashed and she wanted to get us as far away from it as possible. As much as I complain about her being a pain in the you know what, she really is a great dog.

This morning Matthew saw the stroller again and had a minor meltdown that we couldn't go for another long walk before we headed to the babysitter's. He doesn't understand that there is to be no walking when it is cold and raining out. I tried to explain it to him, but he didn't care. All he wanted to do was "walk" as he kept repeating over and over, arching his back and flailing about as I was buckling him into his car seat. Wrangling an 18 month old is no small task. I even broke a sweat trying to get him there!

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Long time, no post

Wow, I have not posted in a really long time, but that's because a lot has been happening in our crazy lives.

Since December 22, I found out that number 2 will be making his or her appearance on or around September 3. That's right, two under two. We're nuts!!

This pregnancy has been different and similar in so many ways. I am a lot moodier and very short tempered, but I think part of that is lack of sleep and the other part can be contributed to hormones. When I was pregnant with Matthew, I could put my feet up and take naps when I got home from work. With an 18 month old, who's the biggest mama's boy ever, napping is really not an option.

It took 18 weeks, but I am finally starting to get through the day without getting sick or feeling like I could get sick at any time. With Matthew, I threw up just about every day of my pregnancy, but once it was done, I wouldn't feel sick anymore. With this one, it's been 24/7 non-stop nausea. I'd like to say I'm not complaining, because we are so blessed to be able to expand our family one more time, but I can't help it - I'm complaining. It sucks feeling like junk all the time. I know  that once the doctor puts that little baby on me though, all of the yuckiness will be a distant memory and my life will once again change for the better.

I don't think Matthew understands that we're bringing him home a built-in playmate in a few months either. I'm a little nervous about how he is going to react. He's such a joy to be around, and although he gets into mischief sometimes, there isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't make me laugh and smile. He doesn't speak many words yet, but when you ask him if he wants a brother or a sister he almost always says no, no, no. As the baby in utero grows, I am feeling kicks and rolls more and more. The other day, Matt was laying on me and the baby had a huge movement, Matt gave me the strangest look, pointed to my belly, laughed and said no, no, no. Maybe he does understand more than I give him credit for...

Marley on the other hand is most certainly not excited that we will be bringing home another little person to terrorize her. She's been a handful to say the least these days, which has been a major contributor to my short tempered ways. She is no longer the center of my attention and I know it bugs her, so any time I am on the floor with Matt, she has to get right in between us, wagging her tail and more often than not knocking Matt over in the process. She adores Matt and the two play together very nicely, but when it comes to mama the two of them are constantly fighting for my attention. It's very tiresome being so loved haha. I can't imagine what it's going to be like when we throw a newborn into the mix. Continued prayers are welcome.