Friday, November 20, 2015

Adjusting to being a working mom

Back in my twenties, I would have sworn up and down that I would never want to be a stay at home mom. Even when I was desperately trying to have a baby, I always thought that I would be so bored at home "just taking care of my kids." Oh how I am eating my words.

I would give anything to be able to spend all day with them now. They are seriously the coolest kids in the world.  When I was out on maternity leave, we were in this groove where we'd wake up, eat breakfast, play for a few hours or go on an "adventure"to the grocery store or to the zoo, and then I'd put both kids down for a nap. I can't believe that actually happened almost every day, and during that quiet time, I'd get the chores done, start dinner or sit and have a second cup of coffee. It was blissful. I even found myself really enjoying cooking - a task that, before Avery, was one that I always dreaded.

Now that I am back at work, I am missing those "blissful" days. Getting to spend just a few hours of the day with them isn't enough. By the time I walk in the door, it's dark outside, the kids need dinner, baths, some playtime and then bedtime by 9 p.m. I miss them, and they are right here with me. My weekends are filled with playing catch up on household chores, laundry and grocery shopping. I'm lucky I have a husband that does his fair share of chores, because otherwise I think I'd go insane. 

I love my job and what I do for a living, but I miss my kids when I am at work. I know they are in good hands, but they are not my hands, and so in closing I'm envious of all you stay at home moms out there.

Here are some updated photos of my prides and joy.

Friday, November 6, 2015

And then there were two!

Avery Elizabeth was born at 2:22 a.m. on August 27, 2015, and it was at that exact second that our family felt complete. Over these last 10 weeks, I have never been happier in my entire life. My two children bring me so much joy that I feel my heart could burst. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I was born to be a mom, and it just so happens, in my humble opinion (haha), that my two little ones are the best two kids in the whole wide world.

I was expecting the transition from one to two to be the most exhausting, grueling, frustrating and exciting time of my life. Am I tired? Yes. Are there days when I get frustrated? Of course. Is it the most exciting time of my life? Absolutely. To be honest, being a mom of two has been very natural for me. I feel so much more relaxed this time around. I wake up in the morning and say to myself, "I got this," and for the most part, I really do.

During my maternity leave, I took the kids out to the park, to the zoo, to the mall, to the grocery store, to the doctors... where ever I needed to go, the two of them were in tow. We took at least one adventure every week, and I thoroughly enjoyed spending quality time with my children each and every time. Even that time in Target when Avery screamed the entire trip, and Matthew decided it would be hilarious to keep dropping things out of the cart to watch Mommy try to pick the items up while baby wearing a screaming infant. If that had happened when Matthew was 9 weeks old, I would have ditched the cart and went home, and then cried for a couple of hours. This time around, I said "I'm not coming back later, so sorry folks, you will enjoy/cringe at the vocal talents of Miss Avery for the next 45 minutes." Was I sweating like a pig and shushing Avery as I pushed the cart through the aisles? Yep! Was I pleading with Matthew to just sit tight a little while longer so that mommy could get what she needed? You betcha! And was I getting side glances from annoyed shoppers, unfortunately yes. But we got through the trip, and I didn't have to go back later. I just kept reminding myself that other parents have been through this. There will be a time in the future that I'll look back and say those were the best days of my life, because I got to spend it with my kids when they actually liked being near me and wanted to spend every waking moment attached to my hip.

I went back to work this week, and it was HARD! I enjoy my job, but I really loved being home with my kids. I tell my husband constantly that it was the best time of my life. I even told him recently that we should have a third, so that I could go on maternity leave again. I'm pretty sure he secretly scheduled the vasectomy for the next day. But, it's those days when one or both of them are up at 2 a.m. that I just smile and think to myself, life doesn't get any better than this. My life as a working mom is hard, because it's 9 hours a day that I don't get to cuddle my two little loves. But I also appreciate the time I do get with them that much more.