Hitting milestones

Matthew amazes me every day, and lately he has been hitting milestones that we haven't even been working on. For example, I walked downstairs this morning and Matthew was playing with a toy on the floor. Out of the blue, he started clapping to himself, because he was proud that he had made the toy do what it was supposed to do. I rarely ever clap for him, I say yay Matty or pat him on the back, but clapping just hasn't been something that I do on a regular basis, and yet, he suddenly knows how to do it? Amazing!

He has also been getting pretty ballsy and will get himself to a standing position and just let go. Nine times out of 10 he falls on his rear end, but sometimes he can let go, stand by himself for a few seconds and then grab a hold of the table or the pack n play again without losing his balance. When he accomplishes this, he starts cheering for himself. His hoots and hollers are just too cute for words.

And finally, he started doing "so big." I'll go how big is Matty, and he'll throw his arms in the air to show me just how big he is. Again, we hadn't been working on this for any significant length of time, but he picked it up nonetheless. These may seem like silly or small feats to you, but to a first time mom, seeing my child accomplish these milestones is just such a blessing. I could literally watch him laugh and play all day long and just smile from ear to ear.

I am so proud of my little guy. Tomorrow is daddy's first time taking Matthew to the doctor's by himself, I can't wait to hear how it goes and how big Matty Matt really is getting.

nine months on the outside

It's crazy to think that Matthew is already nine months old - the same amount of time it took to bake him. When I was nine months pregnant, all I wished for was to go into labor, so that I could finally meet him. What I didn't know was just how much my life would change once he became a full part of it.

When I was on light bed rest the last week leading up to his birth, I'd talk to him and sing to him all day long while I was surfing the net, adding songs to his baby playlist and watching hours upon hours of television. (There wasn't a whole lot I could do, because of my high blood pressure, so sitting my large butt on the couch was pretty much all I did during that time period.) Even then, I'd play this game with him where I would press lightly on one part of my stomach and he'd kick me on the opposite side. Then, I'd press lightly on the side he had just kicked and he'd punch me on the other side. We had already established this undeniable bond even though we hadn't officially met face to face at that point. Heck at nine months pregnant, I didn't even know he was a boy yet.

Today, Matty and I still have a strong bond, and I could still sit my butt on the couch for hours and sing and talk to him if life allowed me to do that. Although, nowadays, getting him to sit still for more than 5 minutes is a challenge. This kid wants to go, go, go. He's crawling and getting into EVERYTHING, and now that he can pull himself up to a standing position, it's only a matter of time until he takes off walking. As it is, my little daredevil tries to let go, unsuccessfully, countless times a day.

He's growing up so fast. I just wish time would slow down just a bit. 

Mr. Personality

Matthew seems to have grown at laser light speed intellectually over the past few weeks. Since the start of June, he started feeding himself food, crawling with his belly off the floor, standing for a few seconds by himself and focusing more intently on objects. It's been incredible to watch him explore new things and become more aware of his surroundings.

Since June 1, he's also been extra clingy to mommy and began expressing his discontent through the form of screaming, kicking, and throwing himself into a backward arch position if I tell him no or try to put him down or give him to daddy so that I can get a few house chores done. This has been an eye opening experience, because how do you handle a not-quite nine month old who's getting a mind of his own? It's a little too early for time outs, but it's very trying at times when I can't seem to take 5 minutes to clean up the inch of dust that has been accumulating around the house. My allergies are telling me it's time to put the baby down and do my chores!

If you read my blog regularly, you may notice that I have a slight, irrational fear of the unknown, and my latest flash of anxiety is that I am parenting wrong. I love that my Matthew is a mama's boy, and I am thrilled that I am his favorite person, because quite frankly, he's my favorite person... (sorry Eric, Matthew edges you out ever so slightly) However, what if my actions now affect him long term? For example, if Matthew doesn't want to play on the floor and would rather be carried around, I pick him up and finish the vacuuming with him attached to my hip - literally. There's a small part of me that worries this behavior will only get worse as he grows older into his toddler years and then everyone will be talking behind my back, or to my face, about how my two year old runs the roost. 

My thought process now is that he is only this age for so long, and I want him to know that no matter what I will always be there for him. But on the other hand, I want him to grow up to be independent with a mind of his own, but with love and respect for others.

I guess, for now, I am going to continue to plug along and do what I feel is best. These phases are short lived and it won't be long before he decides he's too cool for mommy, so I am just soaking up the love and adoration... hopefully it lasts into his adult years.

Everybody's puking, everybody's pooping!!

Yesterday morning, I felt a little sluggish, so I decided that instead of bringing my Labradoodle Marley's crate in from the trunk of my car, I'd block off the back room and let her roam free while we were at work. My bags, that I also did not feel like putting away, were "securely" placed in an area that I thought the dog wouldn't be able to get into nor would she be able to open the bag.

I should never underestimate the smarts of a poodle and the determination of a Labrador. That troublemaker not only got into my overnight bag, she took out all of my jewelry - thankfully didn't eat any of my valuables - ingested a Benadryl and licked clean my new container of skin cream. I knew I didn't need to call the vet, because the skin cream was all organic and made from natural ingredients, but I also knew that the result of her boredom and my stupidity would not leave me unpunished.

At about 6 p.m., Marley started puking, and shortly after that she had the runs. At roughly the same time, Matthew decided that he was going to poop up his back, get it into his hair, and then roll around so that it would seep through his clothes, onto the floor and all over mommy's white t-shirt. I put Eric on dog duty, and brought Matthew straight upstairs and into the bathtub.

When he decided he was done with the bath, he reached up and climbed into my arms soaking wet. I'm so glad I had just minutes before changed my shirt. He still needed his hair washed, so instead of making him upset by putting him back into the tub to finish up, I thought it'd be a brilliant idea to wash his hair in the sink. It would have worked out perfectly, except  I forgot to move a glass from the counter and Matthew promptly picked it up and threw it on the floor, shattering it into teeny tiny little pieces. I then moved my foot a fraction of a centimeter and stepped on the tiniest piece I could find so it embedded into my big toe and disappeared. It's only remnants was the stabbing pain that shot through my foot with each step I took. 

The remainder of the night consisted of a whiny 8 month old, a sick dog and a very cranky mommy. I'd like to thank my husband who cleaned up the glass and the rugs, and then put the baby to bed so that mommy could get some much-needed peace and quiet.

Overnight at Grandma's

I was in an out of town wedding this weekend, so I had to leave the baby overnight with "Amma" for the first time. I think the anticipation of leaving him was much worse than actually being away.

Don't get me wrong, I missed my baby so much, but at the same time, I knew he was in good hands. I was also reassured during the many checkins that Matthew was unaware I was even missing in action, because he was busy having fun with Amma, Aunt Chris and his cousins. He played hard and crashed harder, so he didn't even keep my mom up in the middle of the night. When I arrived at my mom's  house he was completely at ease.

I actually don't think Matthew started to miss me until I was back home and he was in my arms. It was then that he realized I was there again, and he wanted to nuggle in tight to my chest and stay close to me for the remainder of the night. He even bit down hard on my finger to make sure I wasn't a dream. Apparently, no one told him that the expression is pinch me to show me I'm not dreaming. The expression is NOT bite mommy to see if I'm dreaming. Yep buddy, I'm back, here's the bite mark to prove it.

The wedding was such a good time though. It was great to see my college friends all together again after such a long time. We laughed and cried and laughed some more. I danced until my joints hurt, I laughed until my cheeks hurt and I drank like I was in college again... It's two days after the festivities and I am still hungover. It's amazing how 9 years ago, we could party hard Friday and Saturday nights and still function the next day. It's Monday, and I am still having a hard time functioning. Thirty is definitely NOT the new 20. Congratulations to my dear friends Kelly and Adam on their nuptials. They are an amazing couple, and I am so honored to have been a part of their special day!

Why won't he sleep through the night?

When Matthew was first born, he was a great sleeper. We actually thought something was wrong with him, because he slept so well. I had to wake him to feed him and change him, and sometimes he even slept through that. Then, at about 4 months old, he flipped the tables. I can count on two fingers the number of times he's slept through the night since the 4 month mark, and let me tell you, Mama is tired!

These last few weeks have been especially trying in our household. Matt's been working on his fifth tooth and he let's everyone know about it. Poor Marley, my crazy Labradoodle, is even feeling the exhaustion.

Two nights ago, Matt woke up at 1 a.m. and the last time I checked the clock it was 4 a.m., so really, who knows how long we were up in the middle of the night. I tried everything, walking, rocking, feeding and resulted to testing out the cry it out method. Let me tell you, I hate the cry it out method. It literally makes me panicky. As he cries harder, my ears get hotter, my blood starts rushing and I can't help it, I have to go and pick him up. Some tough mommies may call me weak, but I can't help it. I also hear them telling me that he's manipulating me. You know what, I know he is, but as a first time mom I can't stop myself from running to him and soothing him.  My baby needs to know that I am there for him when he needs me.

Turn page to last night, Matt again woke up at 1 a.m. and I walked him, fed him, changed him, rocked him, laid on the couch with him where eventually he went off to dreamland or so I thought. Repeat steps 1 - 5.

My hair is starting to look ragged. My eyes have bags under them. And my bones are starting to ache with exhaustion. People said parenting gets easier with time. Time is passing. It's getting harder.

But at the end of the day, would I change any of it? Not a chance!